


pining losers anonymous

by saintpyrite



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Pining, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:54:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26573311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saintpyrite/pseuds/saintpyrite
Summary: The best thing to do with your friends is start a club to pine over your crushes.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 17
Kudos: 131





	pining losers anonymous

If there was anything in the world Virgil hated more than weddings, it was New Years celebrations. 

It wasn't as if he could bail though, their whole dorm building had been turned upside down. A wasteland of takeout boxes from the Chinese down the road spread across every available surface throughout the dormitory and there was enough alcohol to kill a man twice over, though Virgil wouldn't be surprised to find most of those drinks were coating the floorboards in a thin layer of stickiness. 

Laughter and yelling accompanied the beat of the music, an earthquake of sound shaking the foundations of the building and the countdown would likely make the controlled chaos descend into madness that Virgil was not prepared for. Dodging and weaving through the halls, he managed to find a quieter spot in the shared kitchen to slump against the wall, peering out of the open window into the night.

These big parties were never Virgil's scene, he could handle small crowds and drinking with his friends but Roman had insisted on his attendance, practically begged him and if he didn’t show up, Virgil knew he wouldn't hear the end of it. 

Instead of focusing on the music and screaming, it was easier to watch the world outside and swish the liquor in his cup around. He was starting to think Logan had a good point about the plastic cups, remembering how glasses had been banned from future parties and social gatherings after an incident that ended the night in the ER with blood and glass everywhere. It was a wild night if Logan's detailed account held truth to it, Virgil was glad he missed that night. 

_I could be at home playing Animal Crossing,_ Virgil thought as he watched the dark liquid splash against the sides of his cup, _Roman knows I hate these things and it isn't as if New Years even matters…_

One arm wraps around his waist, pulling Virgil out of his thoughts and into the embrace of a warm body pressing against his back. The other arm hangs off his shoulder with a cup in hand and Virgil almost tries to flail and fight his way out of the hold until he hears the familiar chuckle and in his peripheral, catches Remus resting his head on Virgil's shoulder. The way pink dusts across Remus' tawny brown skin from the alcohol, the close proximity as he hung off Virgil and the grin on his face as if he's so happy to see Virgil; it was enough for his own face to turn several shades of red, feeling Remus pressed against him. 

“What’s up, Nightmare before New Years?” Remus laughed at his own little joke, loud and vibrant in Virgil’s ear, “Why aren’t you hanging around with Roman or Patton? Come on, how about you hang around with me?”

Remus was _drunk_ , that much was obvious as he pressed for answers and even worse, felt the need to press up against Virgil in a way that made him feel as if the two of them would fuse. The taller man leaned close into his ear, emphasising his words with a click of his tongue after whispering in a sultry voice that had all the hairs on Virgil’s body stand up on end, “You can sit in my lap if you’d like.”

It took the combined efforts of Roman and Patton to peel Remus from Virgil’s back, leading him away to give Virgil his space. The young man watched as his friends led Remus away, the latter protesting and whining about how he just wanted to get Virgil to join in on the fun. The whole scene had played out in a way that would replay itself in his mind for a while now, Virgil willing the heat of his cheeks to cool down as he sipped away at his jack and coke. 

Virgil had been harbouring a _little_ crush on Remus for some time now. The rowdier Castillo twin had a way of intimidating Virgil when they’d first met, always so loud and graphic with his ideas that left a sinking pit in Virgil’s stomach. He’d only gotten used to having Remus around because of how close he was to the man’s brother, Roman and how close their buildings were on campus but once there had been an adjustment period with Remus hanging out as part of the main friend group, Virgil had found that Remus wasn’t so scary after all.

He was loud and dramatic in a similar fashion to Roman, though he was far more lewd and more often than not, he liked to get right up close to someone’s personal bubble and pop it. It didn’t sit well with Virgil at first, though now he had grown used to the taller man hanging off of him and as time went by, Virgil found he enjoyed Remus hugging him or leaning against him. That’s when it had spiralled out of control into a crush he couldn’t ignore, watching Remus out of the corner of his eye while he was painting his strange, abstract and violent masterpieces or the warmth of hearing Remus laugh when Virgil told one of his dark jokes that made Patton grimace or how Remus trusted Virgil enough to confide in him about his intrusive thoughts, how he used his art to express them in a healthy manner.

That wasn’t even scratching the surface on the reasons why Virgil had a pathetic crush on Remus Castillo either, what with his charisma and good looks that made him way out of Virgil’s league. It made it impossible to ignore him, Virgil wasn’t sure if he’d ever get over these feelings if Remus was going to keep being the centre of attention in his small, little world.

At least he wasn’t the only one suffering with pining loser syndrome, watching Roman and Patton engaged in conversation on the other side of the room. It was somewhat relieving, knowing that he wasn’t alone when it came to looking like a complete idiot around their crush because there would _always_ be Roman. Overdramatic, impulsive and passionate Roman who was trying to impress Patton with his physical prowess, boasting about his strength and grinning wildly every time he got a giggle out of their friend. Whenever it came to flirting, Roman had a bad habit of making himself the centre of attention and bigging himself up that it threw Virgil through a loop that _anyone_ would be impressed but then again, Virgil liked Roman’s brother so he supposed he had his own issues.

As the clock was going midnight, Emile had managed to pull Patton away leaving Roman whining and frustrated at losing his chance at a New Years’ kiss with Patton. It made Virgil’s entire night, a smug smile on his face the entire time Roman complained about it, long after the party was over and the two were left to clear up the shared kitchen while everyone else was either cleaning up elsewhere, throwing up in sinks and toilets or passed out where they landed. 

“Can you believe it though?” Roman whined, throwing his hands up and dropping the bin bag. He only groaned louder in annoyance as the plastic cups rolled out onto the floor again, “It’s as if Emile was conspiring against me!”

That had Virgil laughing, earning him a glare as Virgil started emptying the bottles of alcohol that barely had a shot glass worth of liquid left. It was amusing watching Roman take out his annoyance on the plastic cups, given how Roman wasn’t going to say anything to the likes of Emile who would no doubt feel guilty about ruining Roman’s lame plan and try to play matchmaker. 

“It’s not that funny, Vee.” 

Virgil grinned wider at the unimpressed pout on Roman’s face, “I don’t know about that, it looked pretty damn funny from where I was standing.”

Red streaked across the room as Roman threw a barrage of sticky plastic cups at him in response, breaking out into an all-out war until Logan came in and yelled at the pair for being immature and making more of a mess. A comfortable silence fell over the two of them as they picked back up where they left off, the occasional yawn passing through the air as the two of them grew tired in the early hours of the morning. Virgil picked up on how Roman had grown quiet, uncharacteristically so and the look of contemplation was etched into his features, making it pretty obvious _who_ was on Roman’s mind at that moment. 

“Why don’t you just tell him?” Virgil inquired, careful with his choice of words. He knew Roman admired Patton more than he’d be willing to admit and when it came to anyone else’s opinions, he would always take Patton’s thoughts to heart. It was sweet, they got on well in a way that was disgustingly domestic. “You don’t have to do this stupid shit where you wait for the perfect moment or whatever you’re waiting for, you know.”

The question caught Roman’s attention, panic and fear in his eyes that caught Virgil off-guard. Knowing Roman’s dating history prior, he thought that Roman just wanted to make the whole ordeal theatrical and over dramatic as usual but no, it was clear that Roman had no confidence that Patton would like him back. He was scared of being rejected. 

“Are you fucking stupid, Virge?” Roman hissed defensively, trying to backpedal as if he was being cornered by Virgil’s suggestion. “This is Patton we’re talking about, he deserves better than some half-assed confession and besides, you can’t say much when you’re ogling my brother. Next you’ll be telling me you like Remus, right?” 

It was meant to be accusatory, mocking even and a way for Roman to avoid the confrontation of his own feelings for Patton. Any other day, Virgil might have lashed out and started a whole argument over the topic but he’d grown tired of keeping it to himself now. He’d learnt to accept it, he was in love with Remus Castillo.

“Yeah, I do,” Virgil stared Roman down, “You got a problem with that?”

There was a beat of silence, the tension thick between the two of them as they stared at one another. It seemed Virgil had rendered Roman speechless for once, the man who always had to have the last word.

 _“Oh,”_ is all Roman could manage to say in response after a few minutes or so.

Virgil could laugh at the two of them, stood here like idiots with the most pathetic crushes on their friends with no plans to do anything about it, “Yeah, _oh._ ”

He decided maybe it wasn’t _that_ funny.

* * *

After it became clear that Roman and Virgil were on the same wavelength, they’d found themselves spending more and more time together. They had their own private hangout night with video games and disney films to confide in one another and complain about their crushes. Virgil had openly dubbed it ‘Pining Losers Anonymous’ and the only requirements were being a total loser, having a crush on someone way out of your league _and_ to bring snacks or booze.

Each night could be turned into a drinking game, one that would kill your liver to play. Take a shot every time Virgil brought up how Remus flirted with him in the most crude way possible or how endearing it was when Remus ruffled his hair in that stupid, patronising but sweet way. Take another shot for each time Roman gushed over Patton’s laughter or whenever Roman would swoon over how surprisingly strong Patton was.

They’d be in the hospital for alcohol poisoning if they actually decided to make a game out of it, luckily they weren’t _that_ stupid. 

“How can he be so sweet and adorable yet so _hot_ all at once?” Roman let out a high pitch whine as he slid down the wall into the comfort of Virgil’s lumpy mattress, a bowl of popcorn in his hands until Virgil took it from him. “He’s helping with the stage rigs and everything--”

Virgil interrupted with a grin, “Is that why you’ve been more pathetic than usual?”

“Shut up, you emo nightmare!” Roman pushed himself up, scooping a hand into their shared popcorn to shovel kernels into his mouth. It took everything in Virgil to keep himself from grimacing at how his friend felt the need to keep talking with a mouthful of popcorn, “He was wearing that _stupid_ tight shirt, you know the one and he was lifting all this heavy lighting equipment as if it was nothing and I just _lost_ my mind; I think the janitor could have used my drool to clean the whole theatre!”

Virgil nodded as Roman continued his long drawn-out rant about Patton and how attractive and sweet he was, as if Virgil hadn’t been friends with Patton for years now. It was pretty funny though, seeing the confident Roman Castillo having a minor freak out over how badly he’d caught feelings for someone, a close friend on top of it all too before Virgil realised he didn’t have much room to talk, he was pining after Remus more than ever now.

“What about you?” Roman asked halfway through their third round of Mario Kart, “You got anywhere with Remus?”

Huffing in both amusement at the idea that Virgil would do _anything_ in regards to his feelings and annoyance that it was still ongoing to begin with, “Nope, I’m still in love with your idiot brother that I must have lost my sanity to be so smitten. I’ve spent far too much time thinking about blowing your brother rather than using that time to be working on my coursework.” 

“Oh, gross; that’s my brother, man. I don’t want to think about that.” Roman grimaced, earning a snort of laughter from Virgil that eventually had them both in hysterics. As they came down from the laughing high, right after Virgil crossed the finishing line in first place with a cheer, “God, we both fucking suck so much.”

It was true, they were both terrible at this whole thing of having a crush on someone and finding a healthy way to deal with it that didn’t consist of spending nights together bitching and pining after them with empty calories filling their stomachs. Luckily, friends that suck together, get fucked over together. 

* * *

The days turned to weeks which became months, no progress being made on either side and their little gatherings became a regular occurrence. Nothing seemed to change, everything was as normal as it could be for their friend group until Virgil had grown so used to the signs of a pining loser that he saw them in _other_ people, specifically one other person in particular. 

It only came to Virgil’s attention whenever he hung around Janus because wherever Janus was, it wouldn’t take long for Logan to appear for whatever reason or excuse their resident nerd could conjure from that big brain of his. It wasn’t hard to piece it together, seeing how Logan was oblivious to his own lack of subtlety, the way his eyes would wander down the length of Janus’ body whenever their sly friend drew attention to new clothes or how quick he was to back-up Janus’ points in an argument, always playing the devil’s advocate. 

Virgil decided to bring it up with Roman, figuring it wouldn’t hurt to get a second opinion. Logan would call it a peer review and so, that’s what he was going to do. He was going to get a peer review on Logan’s status as a potential pining loser. 

“I think Logan wants Janus to plug his solution into the nerd’s equation, if you catch my drift.” 

They were just hanging out again as usual in Roman’s room this week, it was the best time to bring it up. Virgil figured that Logan might need someone to confide in the same way that Roman and Virgil had each other. Looking up from his bass where Roman was sitting with his laptop, propped up by pillows to support his back while the electronic device balanced precariously on his lap.

“ _That_ was the worst metaphor you’ve ever come up with,” Roman deadpanned, staring at Virgil as if he was judging him with such a blank expression. Credit to the man’s acting skills, it was clearly a hilarious mathematics innuendo and Roman just doesn’t appreciate good comedy, “Leave the comedy to me, Vee.”

“Remus would have laughed,” Virgil huffed at the blunder, wasting his good sexual innuendos on Roman like that. “I could have said something much worse, maybe that Logan looks as if he’s a starving man who wants to eat Janus’ ass like it’s a Thanksgiving buffet? Does that work better for you, Ro?”

Roman grimaced at the imagery, which made up for the fact that Virgil felt as if he wasted a good pun on him. It’s fine, he had plenty more to sneak into conversations when Remus was around. 

“Not the point anyhow,” Virgil said, dismissing the earlier exchange, “I was thinking we could bring Logan into the fold, maybe let him vent about his _obvious_ crush on Janus. It could be the trinity of losers, rather than the dynamic dumbasses.”

Honestly, this whole little gathering they had going on was probably the stupidest thing but hey, Virgil liked hanging out with Roman like this. It’d been good for their friendship and it was nice to have someone who would listen to him talk about Remus and not have to worry about it getting out or someone bringing it onto themselves to make Virgil act on his feelings when he wasn’t ready, there was a level of trust the two of them had.

“Sure, bring in the nerd but he has to buy his own food and shit; I’m not sharing, the man has a secret sweet tooth and is a total fiend.”

* * *

They’d decided to go out to the club tonight as a group and by _group_ , the whole decision was decided by suggestions in a hat that was rigged by Roman from the get go. Virgil and Logan shared a look of dismay at the fact that everyone just willingly went along with the whole idea, though it wouldn’t be the first time Roman had gotten his way. It was just easier to go along with it in the end and sit on the sidelines, which is exactly what Logan and Virgil were planning to do.

So here they were, two introverts sitting and nursing their drinks in a booth. It was a good spot, close enough to the bar and the dancefloor so they didn’t have to move through so many people to get refills on their drinks and it was easier to keep an eye on their friends from here. It was here that they discovered Logan had a _small_ jealousy streak too, the way his eyes were narrowed and sharp, honed in on the way that Roman was dancing with Janus. It was close, flirtatious in a playful way that the two often acted with one another and it would have been funny to Virgil if he wasn’t afraid that Logan was going to blow a gasket and bottle Roman. 

Settling a hand on the taller man’s shoulder, offering a small smile that hopefully showed his sympathy for Logan when he had caught the other’s attention only to receive a flustered and puzzled look in return, as if he hoped Virgil hadn’t caught on. Oh boy, Logan truly had no idea how obvious he had been these past few weeks.

“I thought that between me and Roman, nobody could be as big of a disaster but _you_ are a mess.” Virgil taunted him, a teasing lilt to his words, “I mean, I never took you for the jealous type.”

“I don’t follow your thought process here, Virgil,” Logan managed to get out, turning his gaze on his drink instead and tapping out the alphabet in morse code along the glass. “There is nothing and no-one here that I could remotely be jealous of, even if I was the type to do so.”

“Maybe I should go dance with Janus then,” Pressing up on the table to stand, pushing Logan’s button on purpose to garner a reaction and he got what he wanted. Logan reached out to grab his wrist, seemingly surprised by his own action as he let go just as quickly. Sitting back down as Logan sheepishly apologised, “You want to talk about it?”

“There’s nothing to discuss,” Logan responded, taking a long swig of his fireball whiskey and grimacing as it went down. “It’s just an infatuation, admiration beyond the intellectual.”

“If it helps, me and Roman are just as bad.”

There was a moment of panic that flashed across Logan’s face that made Virgil want to wheeze with laughter, clearly his friend had a momentary lapse in judgement, given his next words; “Do you _and_ Roman both have feelings for Janus?”

“Oh, fuck no!” Virgil shook his head, having to pause between fits of hysteria and cackling at Logan’s expense, taking great pleasure in seeing the calm and collected Logan Crofters grow flustered and embarrassed. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not blind but Janus is like a brother to me and Roman has his eyes on someone a little less _Janus_ and a lot more _Patton_.”

There was a sigh of relief, Logan’s whole body relaxing for what must have barely being a second until he tensed again when he realised that if Virgil knew that he had feelings for Janus then that meant Roman _absolutely_ knew, the man had a knowing for romance and was akin to a bloodhound when people were interested in others.

“Why are you telling me this?” Logan raised an eyebrow, curious as to where this conversation was going even if it meant being humiliated by the likes of Virgil and Roman because _‘the robot has feelings’_ or something equally as ridiculous. “I’d hate to think you and Roman have taken an interest in my romantic life, I’m not an exhibitionist personally.”

“Dude, nasty. You hang around Remus too much, he's corrupting you." Virgil chuckled though, shrugging in response. "Me and Roman talk about it sometimes, about Remus and Patton. Sometimes it's just nice to vent and I figured I'd extend the invitation, y'know? 

The two of them turned their attention back to the dance floor, Logan's attention captured by how Janus moved against Roman all in the name of good fun, not realising how badly Logan wanted to work the nerve to get out there and pull Janus against him, show him that he could be just as fun as Roman was. 

Downing the last of his drink, Logan smiled down at Virgil, "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to spend more time with you and Roman. You can count me in, figuratively speaking." 

The dynamic duo became the tremendously pathetic trio, now with scheduled gatherings and a weekly rotation of who brought snacks. Roman never let Virgil live it down when Logan had sent them a schedule the morning after. 

* * *

It shouldn't have come as a surprise that the club wouldn't last forever, at least not for the reasons it came together but it wasn't as if anybody was expecting the others to make a move on their respective crushes. There would always be new excuses or more important things to focus on, anything to avoid confronting the feelings they'd all accumulated head on. 

So when Roman had grown tired of watching Patton from afar and decided that no amount of big gesture would ever be perfect enough, he just went for it. Not to say that he and Logan weren't supportive though, they were behind Roman one hundred percent. It was just strange after so long to see the cycle being broken. 

The plan had been simple, Roman would spend the day with Patton alone such as going to the latter's favourite café and browsing the shops where Roman might spoil him a little before they went to go see a new film that Patton had been dying to see. It went splendid as well, everything had fallen so easily into place as Roman drove Patton back to his shared apartment with Emile off-campus. 

Apparently though, fate had other plans because Roman's whole idea to confess in the car had gone terribly wrong in the most hilarious and best way possible. Patton had a similar idea, the two had both turned to talk and ended up far too close, smacking their heads together. Virgil and Logan had to stifle their laughter when Roman had relayed the story to the pair the day after. 

The end result was better than Roman could have hoped though, despite the matching bruises he and Patton now sported. He'd gotten the boy, just like the end of every great romance film he'd ever seen and it was _perfect_ enough for him. 

Virgil and Logan couldn't be happier for Roman either, they truly were happy that the two had gotten together but this meant having to suffer through Roman's gushing over how good of a boyfriend Patton was and all their dates. Luckily, they were spared any dirtier details. 

"So," Roman's tongue clicked against the roof of his mouth as he grinned wildly at Logan and Virgil, "Who's confessing next?" 

Virgil wanted the earth to swallow him whole. He was certain Logan shared the same sentiment. 

* * *

There was an unspoken agreement that Logan and Virgil were less likely to admit their feelings to their respective interests and it was comforting. 

Virgil was petty enough to admit he called Logan a traitor when he found out that his fellow introvert and loser had confessed to Janus, though there was no malice. He just hated being the one left behind. 

It had been rather straightforward as far as Logan was concerned, though Janus told it differently. It was hard to figure out whether Logan was saving face or if Janus was lying about how the confession went down but Virgil chose to take Logan's word for it in the end.

It had all been unintentional compared to Roman's well thought-out plan, it just happened in a blur during one of their study sessions. The two were having a civil debate, giving pointers for their opposing sides so that Janus had a better idea of how to write his dissertation for his classes. It wasn't _supposed_ to go the way it did, even if Logan didn't mind what it resulted in. 

Everything had gone so well, civil words exchanged and progress made. It was only after Janus had made an invalid argument that everything had spiralled out of control, resulting in a screaming match. It wasn't how Logan envisioned sharing his feelings, in such a way that was embarrassingly immature and emotionally charged. It had just slipped out. 

"So you two were yelling loud enough to wake the whole building," Roman drawled out with a look of absolute disbelief and secondhand embarrassment, "Only to end up making out by the end of it?" 

Logan opened his mouth, ready to defend himself before reluctantly nodding. It wasn't far off from the truth after all as embarrassing as it was to admit. 

"God, how can someone so smart be so stupid?" Roman laughed, trying not to choke on his drink as he sucked his Pepsi through the straw. 

Virgil felt the need to contribute, "I guess arguing is a bit like foreplay for you then, Lo. If you and Janus ever have a disagreement now, we'll know to leave the room!" 

With a huff, Logan shared a look with Roman before speaking up, "Hey, Virgil. It's your turn next." 

* * *

In the end, it left Virgil with all the pressure on him now. He was beginning to resent the fact that they'd formed this triad because it was impossible to escape the two friends that _knew_ every little detail about his crush on Remus. He couldn't back out now though, it was a year in the making and Roman would relentlessly hunt him down if he tried to bail. 

His only solace from Roman's insistence and Logan's backhanded advice was how fast New Year's Eve had come back around again. That meant Roman left him alone just enough for him to slip into the crowds of the party. 

Sure, Virgil would rather be in the safety of his room with his big noise-cancelling headphones blasting music and his Switch in hand instead of watching Roman and Patton be sickeningly adorable together or listening to the likes of Janus flirt nonchalantly with Logan in an effort to make his boyfriend flustered but Virgil would take blending in and avoiding his friends as a close second. He got free food and drinks on top of it all too, so silver linings. 

The building was stuffy though, the air conditioning being busted and the amount of bodies in each room making it hard to breathe. That's how Virgil had found himself hiding out on the rooftop, using a loose brick to prop open the fire exit door at the top of the stairwell. 

The view was something, stars spread out across the night sky as far as the eye could see and fireworks in every direction over the horizon. New Years had some perks, the view was definitely one of them. 

"Enjoying the view?" The voice caught Virgil's attention, making his heart beat faster against his ribcage as if it threatened to break out. Remus laid his jacket out on the concrete of the roof before sitting down next to Virgil, bumping their shoulders together, "You hiding away from me now?" 

"Oh yeah, absolutely." Virgil tried to suppress the smile creeping up on his face, though he could already tell he'd failed miserably to do so when Remus grinned back at him, "I just needed the air, though the view is pretty nice what with the fireworks and the stars." 

A soft hum came from Remus as a silence fell over them. If it hadn't been so quiet this high up, drowning out the noise of the party, Virgil might have missed what Remus said next altogether. 

"I wasn't talking about the sky, Virgil." 

In the end, Virgil didn't need to confess. He didn't have to say a word, only listen because as it turned out, Remus was able to talk enough for the both of them. Everything else just fell into place, hands entwining as they watched the fireworks go off and the party downstairs was nothing but white noise after the countdown, leaving Virgil and Remus in their own world. 

* * *

The trio didn't stop meeting afterwards though. If anything, they just ended up getting better and better. 


End file.
